THE Relationship

Many people believe in a higher power. Whether for religious reasons, sports luck, or rehabilitation from addictions, higher powers provide a sense of security in times of weakness. In the article http://www.selfhelpmagazine.com/article/alcohol-rehabilitation , Self-Help encourages relationship and trust with a higher power to improve rehabilitation and get back on track.

I have a relationship with a higher power, his name is Lord.  He is the God of my life.  He gives me a contagious joy, an open heart, and an unconditional love for those around me.  Without God, I wouldn’t live the life I live. My selfish ambition would take over and my life would lack meaning.

The best part is – I did nothing to deserve this love.

God’s love is free and the relationship comes through accepting His son he sent to Earth, Jesus.  My relationship with God through Jesus is the best part of my life, it’s my number one priority – and it’s fun!  God is my best friend.

A relationship with a higher power provides you with a certainty not much else can give. You gain a sense of protection, direction, and love.  You don’t have to believe in God. You can believe in Greek gods, idols, Buddha, the stars, or even an invisible being. A relationship with a higher power is completely your choice, but until you try it, you’ll never know if the benefits outweigh the cost.

Do you have a relationship with a higher power?

To be, or not to be, INTENTIONal

I have a hard time not wanting to know about your life.  If I am introduced to you (or if I just introduce myself to you), you can count on me to follow up the introduction with a seemingly never-ending sequence of questions. I love people.

For some, loving people comes naturally.  They love to talk, to get to know you, and to “hang out.”  For others, this is not so much of a pass time as it is a chore.  Alone time is crucial for them and talking is out of absolute necessity. Because of this difference in personality, the choice to be intentional with your words and actions is important. You must consider the personality of whom you are speaking with before you ask them a question or try and strike up conversation.

“How are you?” can illicit all sorts of responses.

These very anywhere from a simple “good” to him or her recapping their day, play-by-play.  To someone who is wordy, be specific with your questions and ask a more direct question pertaining to the issue you are trying to discuss. This will help them realize exactly what you want to know and hopefully give you a desired response. To someone who is prone to one word answers, ask questions that relate to personal reflection on the subject and questions that force them to give you insight into who they are. The more information a reserved person must share, the stronger the bond and the easier to continue conversation.

Choose to be intentional with your questions and where to devote your time. Build relationships and get to know those around you. People will surprise you.

The art of Criticism or the burn of Cynicism

Criticism: the act or art of analyzing and evaluating or judging the quality of anything.

Cynicism: cynical disposition, character, or belief; bitterly or sneeringly distrustful, contemptuous, or pessimistic.

In relationship, a certain level of accountability must be maintained.  Accountability as a way of guiding one another toward desired goals.  The idea is to keep one another in check and can be achieved through calling out flaws and bringing possible issues to light.

The key lies in how to approach the accountability.

Critical Accountability is the “iron that sharpens iron” (Proverbs 27:17).  Any criticism is hard to hear, but simply being critical and giving constructive advice out of love will be the push some need to get to where they want to go.  Don’t be afraid of critical accountability or to give this act of love.  If there’s no mirror around and no one tells you about the big zit on your face, you live your life looking like a fool.  Just like critical accountability, you want the honesty of someone to tell you when you need to get rid of something in your life.  When you first pop it, it may hurt,  but in the end, you’ll be glad you are free of the imperfection.

Cynical Accountability is the deep wounds each of us carry.  Inconsiderate critiquing of flaws without love or understanding of the person being sized up leaves them worse off than they were before you opened your mouth.  It thrives on low self-esteem.  Most often, cynical accountability is given to make the sender feel better about their own insecurities they live with.  Loose words and sharp tongues are characteristic of this form of accountability and it is often given in the presence of many others in order to demoralize the receiver.

Shoot for critical accountability spoken out of love.  You could be the encouragement and challenge to change someone’s life.